Where I am, right now

I’m feeling a little blue today. I said my goodbyes to Lizzy this morning, after our final fuck and breakfast, then I went home and she got a lift to the airport and rang me as her flight was being boarded and then again, when she landed in Detroit. I’m not going to sit here and make silly proclamations, about how much we were in love because both of us - and anyone out there who might be reading this - knew that wasn’t the case; we felt a great deal for one another, certainly, but it was never going to be anything else. But what it was, in reality, was something special. And I don’t just mean the sex, which was terrific, but she was younger than me and she had a different viewpoint on things and that was fucking refreshing.

So I’ve felt blue today and sorted out my old boxes of negatives that haven’t been scanned in and I’ve been traipsing through the past again. There are some gems too, which I’ll post here in time, but it was also good to see where I’d been, so that I could hopefully see where I would be going.

Lizzy will be in Detroit for a minimum of six months, before getting to come home and we decided this morning that we would see other people, if the opportunity arose, because we’re both very sexual and nothing is guaranteed in this life. I hope that it’s not the case, that we don’t see one another again, but we’ll email and I’m sure some pictures will be going across the water.

It’s strange, I’ve never had a kind of mouthpiece to the world whenever I’ve had a relationship break-up in the past and I’m not sure what else to say, so I’ll leave it here.

But thanks, Lizzy, I know you’ll read this and I know you enjoyed seeing yourself here - it’s been great. Good times, in fact.

And now, before we look forward, we look back...

I've been around the block, no two ways about it. I'm a divorcee, so I could trot out the usual guff about my wanton days being a reaction against my ex-wife (it wasn't the most pleasant divorce, but it was also far from being as bad as it could have been), but that's just not true. At the time we got married, I loved my wife and wanted to do the right thing. Becoming single again, at 31, I decided to take on the world. And being a photographer eased me in, if you like.

My ex-wife was pretty adventurous, but there were a lot of things that I wanted to try out and the best way to do that, I figured, was with someone I wasn't going to see again. This tied in with digital cameras becoming really affordable and so I took to cataloguing everything - most of the girls that I got intimate with had no problem with me using the camera. Some of them I still see around (their photo's will never appear here), most I don't and I prefer it that way.

So, you're given your freedom, you're solvent, with your own hair and teeth, what would you like to do?

I’ll tell you…